Photo Op

Photo Op

It’s Day 20 of being back to blogging, and while scrolling through pictures on my phone searching post inspiration, I came across one the perfect photo op. The term, short for photograph opportunity, was originally coined to indicate the opportunity to take a picture with a celebrity or of an event. But as I looked at this picture, it took on new meaning for me. You see, it’s of a corner in bedroom I share with my fifteen-year-old daughter at our tiny house and was designed to fulfill her request  for a vanity area. I began renting the house for personal and professional to run my business, Pink Collar Savvy & Chic, and to have a special place to spend time with my children.

At first my husband wasn’t on board with it, which caused some discord –– another D or challenge women face. Following a particularly rough patch, he brought the beautiful bouquet of my favorite pink roses to my new job as a repair attempt. Originally I took the picture in a fit of I don’t want flowers, I want to resolve the issue! Eventually I got over myself and can now look back and see my husband’s heart. It makes me mindful of the chance to be prayerful about all it represents –– a true photo op.

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A beautiful, comfortable and functional vanity area. The painted wood cafe table and chairs were purchased at TJ Maxx for outdoors, but I hated them weathering. Now they have a new purpose. The lamp and wicker mirror/basket are two of my early thrift store finds. Large Ball mason jar from Goodwill. Simply Shabby Chic pillows & laundry basket –  Target. 

In a world where cameras on our phones make snapping a picture something that often occurs several times a day, I still want to make it special. Through blogging it’s become a way for me to chronicle the simple and significant in my life. Being intentional about maximizing photography opportunities by attaching prayers of ACTS –– adoration, confession, thanksgiving and supplication –– to my reminiscing over  pictures elevates them from simply snapping away to powerful photo ops.

So the next time you hit that button to capture that perfect picture, I hope you’ll be Pink Collar Savvy & Chic and not miss out on the photo opportunity that’s present too…

Be savvy & chic,

~Pink Collar Coach

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Abandoning Adulting

Abandoning Adulting

It’s Day 19 of being back to blogging, and personal and professional experiences in the social service field/ministry caused me to ponder abandoning adulting. Juggling my responsibilities as a women’s center director, a small business owner, a mom, a wife, a Zumba student, blogger and believer took all the energy I could muster! At times I just wanted to say, Enough! I’m done adulting for the day! And that’s before factoring in a crisis at work where the stressors of life caused a woman to literally abandon adulting. Adulting.jpg

As much as it’s tempting to judge someone else for reaching the point where they simply stop juggling all the responsibilities and just throw their hands up in the air, letting them fall where they may, I’m coming to understand how the Ds –– the personal and professional challenges women face –– can lead up to this (in this case, it’s a combination of depression, drugs and dysfunctional relationships). Perhaps we were designed with only two arms because we weren’t meant to juggle as much as we do…So rather than judging, I’m learning to support where I can. Because my own arms are too full with my own responsibilities to take on another’s, I lift them up in prayer, knowing God is the one who equips us for whatever He’s placed in our hands.

I don’t know what God makes of the term adulting, which has become popular in our culture –– often with parents. But I’m glad to know He’s our heavenly Father who never abandons His “adulting” with us, His children…

Be savvy & chic,

~Pink Collar Coach

 

Sadie Hawkins Shopping Success

Sadie Hawkins Shopping Success

It’s Day 18 of being back to blogging, and though I’ve missed over a week posting due to being sick, I’m excited to share about this weekend’s Sadie Hawkins shopping success. In this day and age when the traditional dynamics of this dance –– where the girls ask the guys –– are so much more complex, I have to confess I’m relieved to report that my 15-year-old is “going doe” and the most challenging piece of the equation was the quest for the dress. Though I’d been down with bronchitis and flu, my teen made it clear she wanted to go looking with me. Getting up proved to be worth the effort because after she futilely searched for just the right thing, I spotted it and knew I’d hit gold the minute she laid eyes on a youthful yellow number that could have been tailor made for her petite frame. Not only that, despite her doubts that I could help her secure just the right type of bra for the dress’ cut, I nailed that and she now owns her most flattering, and therefore favorite ever. All in all, I’d say our Sadie Hawkins shopping was a success!

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Sadie Hawkins Shopping Success! A flirty floral in her favorite – yellow. Dress from TJ Maxx. 

As a divorced mom (a D or challenge women face) and Maxxinista, this shopping expedition proved to be a positive experience on many levels. There was a time in the not so distant past where stepmom’s influence and preferences carried far more weight than mine. And I’d have been alright with that had said stepmom not usurped my place as Mom and had her tastes been a little more refined and budget friendly. Stepmom is now out of the picture, which is sad in some ways, however, I’m relieved that the balance has been restored to my relationship with my daughter. Had stepmom still been around, I’m almost certain this mom-daughter experience would have been yet another we missed out on because she stepped in and shopped with her before we got the chance to do it together.

Now I’m thankful my daughter has a dress she not only plans to wear to the dance –– with combat boots –– and over leggings or jeans like above, we have a bonding memory to look back on. Plus it doesn’t hurt that Liv learned that her mom is has a great eye for style on a shoe string! It makes me hopeful that she’ll grow up to be Pink Collar Savvy & Chic... Based on this weekend’s Sadie Hawkins shopping success, it may well turn out to be a case of like mother, like daughter!

How about you? What special shopping experiences do you share with your daughter? Mother? Other females? Are you Pink Collar Savvy & Chic and maximize them to strengthen your bond?

Be savvy & chic,

~Pink Collar Coach

Blogging, Books and Building a Writer’s Website

Blogging, Books and Building a Writer’s Website

It’s Day 17 of Service on Purpose (this replaces the On Purpose Project) and my day consisted of church, teaching Zumba, blogging, books and coaching a new client to build a writer’s website. Though I’ve been blogging consistently for over a year, I still consider myself a novice. Even so, I’m intentional about living out my purpose –– using my strengths to coach, encourage and inspire others –– and am willing to give it a try. Still supporting a fellow writer and Swan Sister to build her writing website definitely felt like a bit of a stretch for me….I’ve done it and so am not an imposter, however, doubts regarding my ability to coach her through the process plaqued me as I prepped. If you’re anything like me you may have experienced how it’s sometimes easier to do something than to show someone else how to do it. Considering my qualms, I felt such gratitude when this morning’s sermon talked about how serving and  helping someone else helps us to grow our capacity. It may even help us to reach the next level. I’m not an expert on any of the above tasks, but I am willing to utilize the experience, knowledge and skill I do have to bless others…In turn, maybe I’ll be blessed with my  blogging, books and building a writer’s website.

laptop with roses and cofee

In the end, we had a wonderful session. Not without it’s bumps, but those had more to do with the host site not cooperating than me not knowing what I was doing! My client was satisfied with the progress we made and she even sent me a text stating how much she learned and appreciated the information and coaching. And with that, she quieted any niggling doubts that remained.

She also confirmed what the sermon and my spirit say to me. We don’t have to be SMEs –– Subject Matter Experts –– but we do have to be SMEs ––– Someone Making Effort –– to serve others. When we belly up to that, God will level up not only our capacity but our confidence for the next time around. If we’ll be Pink Collar Savvy & Chic and faithful to serve, He’ll cause us to soar. Be that blogging, writing a book, building a writer’s website or whatever acts of service He calls us to.

Be savvy & chic,

~Pink Collar Coach

Recharge Our Batteries and Restore Our Balance

Recharge Our Batteries and Restore Our Balance

It’s Day 16 of being back to blogging and I’m so thankful the weekend provides Pink Collar Swans with an opportunity to recharge our batteries and restore our balance. Whether you’re like me and spend your time in an emotionally intense social service/ministry setting, as a full-time homemaker or at any other job inside or outside the the office, the work week can leave us feeling run down and like we’re functioning on low power mode. When we see this happens with our phones –– when we see that red bar that indicates we need to plug in –– we drop what we’re doing and connect to a power source as quickly as possible. Conversely, when our bodies, hearts, minds, spirit and souls alert us that we’re run down, too often we ignore the warning signs and all but die…But what if we stopped this weekend and took the time time to recharge our batteries and restore our balance?

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Tonight my sweet hubby wanted to do something. As much as I love him and know how important it is to spend quality time together, I also understand I’m a better wife, mother, friend, director, life coach, and Christ follower when I’m not operating on an insufficient charge and have my balance restored. So I took a rain check for tomorrow and look forward to not just a date night but a date day.

Now I’m blogging and vegging on the sofa munching on many of my favorite snacks  while watching Ghost on cable for the first time in 20 plus years. May not be everyone’s version of an awesome Friday night, but I’m loving it. When the movie’s done, I’ll read my devotional and start a novel I picked up at the grocery store on the way home. Hey, if I’ve gotta shop, a trip down the Book and Magazine isle makes it worthwhile! After a good night’s rest and Zumba tomorrow morning, I’ll have enough energy to enjoy my husband, housework, and a host of other things like life working on the sequel to my debut novel. And coaching a new client. Writing is work but a part of the writing life I love!

So that’s the plan. Now I just need to implement it. What’s yours? To recharge personally and/or professionally? I hope we’ll all be Pink Collar Savvy & Chic and put it into place so we can recharge our batteries and restore our balance!

Be savvy & chic,

~Pink Collar Coach

She Committed Self-Sabotage (Prevention) – Part 2 of 2

She Committed Self-Sabotage (Prevention) – Part 2 of 2

It’s Day 15 of being back to blogging, and yesterday I shared a story about a woman I know: She committed self-sabotage; but today I want to share about prevention. One of the most powerful poems I’ve ever read resonated so strongly with me because it marries my love of all things women’s empowerment and faith. And ultimately it simply asks us to be ourselves by overcoming our fears –– not of who we aren’t but of who He created us to be.

be yourself

Our Deepest Fear
By Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness
That most frightens us.

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.

Your playing small
Does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine,
As children do.
We were born to make manifest
The glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us;
It’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we’re liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

Note: This inspiring poem is taken from Marianne Williamson’s book A Return to Love.

Wow! There’s nothing I can add to that. All I can do is ask that you be Pink Collar Savvy & Chic and apply it as a strategy for self-sabotage prevention.

Be savvy & chic,

~Pink Collar Coach

 

She Committed Self-Sabotage – Part 1 of 2

She Committed Self-Sabotage – Part 1 of 2

It’s Day 15 of being back to blogging and I’m sad to share a woman’s story of how she committed self-sabotage. Many of us who are in the social service field/ministry or any helping profession feel called to do the work because we long to make a difference in the lives of others. For me, doing so with women allows me to fulfill my purpose. I feel so blessed that I’m now in a position as a Women’s Center Director where I’m able to assist the ladies who reside in our shelter to achieve transformational change and sustainable success. Homelessness is often the main barrier that brings them to us, but usually they have ended up that way due to multiple barriers.  Finding housing for the residents and their children that is often a challenge. So when a single woman with a child and a myriad of physical, emotional, financial, and relational issues turns down an apartment because she’d prefer to wait  for something more to her liking, she’s committed self-sabotage.

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Another instance of this is when a woman is offered an affordable studio option –– newly renovated and furnished –– with rent based on her limited income and physical barriers to employment, but she would rather go back to coach surfing while she tries to get a job that pays enough for the exorbitant rent on an upscale  apartment with amenities. Even when told she can sign a short term lease on the studio while she addresses her health issues and searches for a job, she’s adamant that it’s just not for her. She’s committed self-sabotage.

After doing all I can apart from literally begging these women to reconsider, I’m relegated to sitting on the sidelines as the scenarios play out. In the first instance, I’ve already seen that it’s not a pretty picture. In the other, I fear the outcome will be similar. Then I’m left to ask, Why? But I realize I may already know the answer, She fears success. And while I’m not a therapist, I do have one on our team, and she confirmed my suspicion. They fear success. 

Pondering this phenomena, it occurred to me that it’s not only the population of women we serve who struggle with the Ds or challenges women face (i.e. depression, diagnosis, domestic violence, drug and alcohol abuse, dysfunctional relationships, etc.) who are subject. Any woman, for any number of reasons, can fear rising to her full potential and may self-sabotage. ..

Rather than letting this discourage me, it’s motivated me to share a self-sabotage prevention strategy. I hope you’ll be Pink Collar Savvy & Chic and come back tomorrow to read.

Be savvy & chic,

~ Pink Collar Coach