It’s Day 228 of the Pink Collar Savvy & Chic on Purpose Project, and I’ve spent the last few days minimizing the fact that I can’t be a mommy on this trip and maximizing being Mimi to my oldest stepson’s daughter. Divorce is one of the Ds (challenges) many of us Pink Collar moms face, and that often means missed holidays with our children. Regular readers may also know I almost stayed home from our annual big fat blended family Christmas Myrtle Beach trip because it’s the first one without my kiddos. Instead, thanks to my hubby, I’m a life coach who practices what she preaches. Basically, I had to put on my big girl pants and minimize the fact that my son and daughter aren’t here and make the most of the fact that my step-grandaughter is.
Izzy (my special name for her – a shortened for of her middle name Isabella) came into our lives not quite three years after I married her grandad. My son had just turned eight. That being the case, I was (and still am) figuring out my place as stepmom and was nowhere near ready to become a grandma. Besides that, Izzy has two other grandmas: my hubby’s ex- Tammy with a y, who is Grammy and her maternal grandma, Abuelita (granny in Spanish), or Lita, who is Puerto Rican. Two funny things about this: Tammy is taller than me, so I’m little Tammi, and I’ve known Lita, also known as Senora, to the high schoolers she’s taught for twenty-plus years for almost as long (back to my days as a middle school teacher). She gave me dishes and silverware when my wasband (was + husband) made me homeless. Now we’re in-laws!
Given that I’ve had a full-time job her whole life, I’ve only spent a few hours at a time with Izzy. This trip has changed that. We’ve played at the mall, swam, gone to see Ferdinand (super cute!), read books and taken the singing and dancing we usually do at home to the next level. And, as four-year-old precocious Izzy would say – “Wait for it” – we took our first Uber to and from the movie theater today! Suburbanite I’ve become, I drive everywhere, so when the guys had a tee time at a course in the opposite direction right when our movie started, I downloaded the app, secured a ride, grabbed the car seat and then enlisted a brawny guy to lug it through concessions right to our seats. I reversed that process on the way home and even had our Uber driver swing by a burger joint for our “linner” (late lunch/early dinner). Who says you can’t teach a middle aged Mimi new tricks? Izzy and I had a blast!
As a Pink Collar Savvy & Chic on Purpose Maximizer, I’m not gonna lie. I’ve missed my children something fierce this trip. Movies and the lazy river are our special things. But if I’d allowed myself to dwell on that, another D, depression, would have set in so bad I’d have missed out on the child God gave me, not just for this trip, but for a lifetime. Now we have our special things- movies and the lazy river included. The adoration, affection, hugs and kisses she’s lavished on me have been a balm for my mommy heart. So much so that though I’m still not ready to take on the title Grandma, I might try Grandmimi on for size.
(Just hear Izzy yell “Mimi!”. Gonna go join her in the pool. 💕).
Be savvy & chic,
~Pink Collar Coach